Kristal Barham

Kristal Barham & Her Children

1.  How many children do you have?

I have two children, a 3 year old son and a 2 year old daughter.

2.  Would you like to have more children?  How many or why not?

My husband and I both wanted to have 4 children. Our ideal family consisted of 2 sons and 2 daughters. Last month we began preparing financially, mentally, & physically (vitamin supplements, exercise, increasing water intake) for a child. We quickly discovered that it was not in God's Will.  So, at this time, we are both okay and open to whichever outcome.

3.  What do you wish you would have known before becoming a mom?

I wish that someone would have told me that your children will teach you how to be a mother. We all have a vision and an idea of how we will parent, and what our children will be like, but you really have no idea until they get here. There is no cookie cutter way to parent, you parent according to your child’s needs and a book can't teach you that.

4.  What are the tasks that you wish someone else would regularly do for you?

I wish someone would regularly prepare healthy meals for my family & do our laundry.

5.  How did you take care of your health and wellness during pregnancy?

During my pregnancy with my son, I did a lot of walking and I read a lot of books. I was very conscious of what I ate. During my pregnancy with my daughter, I prayed a lot and I made sure I was well rested.

6.  Did you have the labor and delivery experience that you desired?  If not, what would have improved your experience?

With my first pregnancy, it was a "dream delivery." It went very smoothly & I did not have any complications. I received an epidural and I felt no pain. My son was born with only a few short pushes and it took about 3 days to completely heal.

When it came time to give birth to my daughter, I was not nervous at all. I was looking forward to having another easy delivery.  I was 4 days past my due date with my daughter so we decided to get induced.

Once I arrived at the hospital and they started me on the Pitocin (medication used to start or improve uterine contractions) my water broke soon afterwards. The doctor came in and said, it’s time to push! I said “WAIT! Where is the epidural?!?” The doctor said this baby is ready to come out! You have to push! I was so terrified! Having a natural birth was something I wanted no part in at all! How was I going to survive this pain? After 20 minutes of pushing I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl and I felt GREAT! It was an amazing experience and I am so grateful for the opportunity to experience that!

7.  How have you taken care of your health and wellness since becoming a mother?

I belong to ladies a gym that I attend three times a week.  I also walk on my lunch break every day for 30 minutes. I also try to get at least 7 hours of sleep each night.

8.  Are you involved in any mommy groups (in-person or online)?

I am not involved in any mommy groups, however I have an amazing group of mommy friends that I meet up with once a week and I read a few books on raising toddlers.

9.  What do you do to relax?

To relax I enjoy spending time with girlfriends, I go on dates with my husband, & most importantly I drink a hot cup of hot cocoa & catch up on my TV shows on DVR.

10.  What advice do you have for new and expecting moms?

My advice would be to take heed to the advice and counsel of elders, but also trust your own instinct and do what YOU FEEL in your heart is best for your child. Above anything else, pray unceasingly the Lord leads you and directs your path as you embark on this journey!

11.  What is the best thing about being a mom?

Motherhood is so rewarding! There are so many great things about being a mother! I would say my FAVORITE thing about being a mother is when I walk through the door to my kid’s excitement. They jump up and down, they squeal, & are overjoyed to see me! It makes me feel so special!

12.  What is the most challenging part about being a mom?

The most challenging part of being a mother is trying to find a perfect balance. I personally find it challenging NOT to compare my kids to my friend’s kids. I have to remind myself that all children have different personalities and reach milestones at different months. I also find it challenging to fit society’s mold of what a mother's job should look like. I have to fully trust and rely on the Lord to keep sane, to raise productive God fearing members of society, & to be in his perfect will for all of our lives!